Varric pauses for a second, considering this mental image and then transplanting it onto dwarves - and has to stop after writing only fuckety to lean back in his seat and just...try not to laugh.

"Maker, I wish I could paint well enough to show you the picture I'm seeing in my head right now. Imagine a lot of bearded, long-haired dwarves - men and women - naked in the stone tunnels of a vast underground city thundering around on nuggalope. Fuck it, anybody can paint a nuggalope..."

He dips the brush into some grey and starts a quick outline of what looks like a giant pig with tiny eyes, bizarrely long legs and huge horns, with big ears and a pointed sort of snout.

"They're all drunk, there's hair, alcohol and coin flying everywhere and at some point, they make the biggest nug they can find a paragon."

He's chuckling as he adds a little curly tail to the nuggalope.