[ alina rubs at her arms. she doesn't like admitting it. speaking the words aloud is like breaking a spell. the scar on her hand is gone and mal is gone and she has no allies. only a power she can barely use. ]
I don't even know that I'd want to. Being Grisha is the first time I've ever felt like I belonged anywhere. [ she'd had to carve a place out for herself and mal in the orphanage, in the first army. even when he'd become charismatic enough to be desirable and fit in, and alina had been the only perpetual outsider, his side was not enough for her. it never had been. it couldn't erase the pain.
she smiles tightly at nina, awkward. ] For obvious reasons.
cw: fantasy racism reference
[ alina rubs at her arms. she doesn't like admitting it. speaking the words aloud is like breaking a spell. the scar on her hand is gone and mal is gone and she has no allies. only a power she can barely use. ]
I don't even know that I'd want to. Being Grisha is the first time I've ever felt like I belonged anywhere. [ she'd had to carve a place out for herself and mal in the orphanage, in the first army. even when he'd become charismatic enough to be desirable and fit in, and alina had been the only perpetual outsider, his side was not enough for her. it never had been. it couldn't erase the pain.
she smiles tightly at nina, awkward. ] For obvious reasons.